Steve and I started our life under extremely stressful situations. We knew, we had to find a way to work around all the situations that were plaguing our life with difficulties of horrendous proportions. These were of financial, emotional, and physical origins and needed to be dealt with cautiously. We made a plan.
I had almost always ended up in tears when a stressful situation got the best of me. Steve, had held it all in for so long, the eventual outcome was a heart attack. So first, no more tears and no more keeping things to ourselves. Our number one goal was to openly talk about everything to each other. Next, because everything was of such a serious nature in our lives at that time, we decided we had to gain the ability to use humor as a tool. So, number two goal was to insert a little humor into each event that was approaching us with the big “S” written in bold letters all over the front of it.
It was difficult at first. Problems were taking over our lives. But, we managed. It was slow. But each time we made a joke about a situation, each time we said, “Well, it could have gone like this,” each time we laughed instead of crying, it got easier. We soon had a whole story worked out, which we joked about contacting a television producer and working it into a movie of the week, always with us being the hero’s, or the good guys, or the empowered winners at the end. In fact we gave ourselves characters and picked the movie stars we wanted to play our parts. We felt that only Mr & Mrs Hollywood (at that time) would be suitable for our characters. Steve would be played by Burt Reynolds, and Lonnie Anderson would fit me, at least in my way of thinking, quite perfectly. In the opposing positions (my ex and Steve’s) the actors would be Danny DeVito and Ria Pearlman, also a well known married couple in the acting world. Now you can see where the humor is coming into play. What could be funnier than this group of actors in a movie of the week?
My whole point here is, use humor. Find a way to put a little lightness into your problems. Talk to your spouse, or significant other, or a best friend. Be honest. But most of all, find a way to laugh. Laugh at the situation, laugh at yourself. Keep everything in the proper proportions, stress low and energy high, using laughter as your friend.